The Understanding
by Andalite Girl
Summary: Tobias tries to help Ax in a time of need.


The Understanding

By: Andalite Girl

Note: I haven't used this name in a long time. Usually I write under the name Girl 17.... But I got really board one night and this is what I came up with. Hope you guys like it. Oh yeah, I haven't read an Animorph book in about a year so...er... Let's just say this happens right before book 23, the one where Tobias finds out Elfangor is his father.

Lonely.

At first it had been almost easy for him. Those months on the dome ship, being the only cadet and the younger brother of a great hero, were akin to hell. Everyone looked down on him. No one wanted his company, no one cared for his opinion. He was sent to do menial tasks... Jobs usually assigned for robot drones, but were now reserved for him alone.

Although terrifying, those weeks on the bottom of Earth's sea were strangely peaceful. It was very serene being by yourself without anyone to order you around... With only the local fish for company. Sure, there was the worry for his brother... But Elfangor was a great hero. Surely he would be able to get out of any situation, right?

Right.

But then, just as now loneliness had set in and he had finally risked sending a transmission... A transmission that was picked up by humans, not his own people. Ax really didn't have room to complain... The Animorphs had been kind to him. They had given him a place to live and eat... They had included him in missions, treated him like an equal unlike his own peers. 

For a time he was almost happy... Almost. But it wasn't enough. It was never enough for him, he supposed. The Animorphs were not his people and Gods, did Ax miss his own people. He was an adolescent in Andalite years, a time where he would normally be pursuing females were instead spent in front of the TV, watching humans kiss in soap operas.

The TV grew into an obsession with him.

And why shouldn't it? It was his only outlet... Like a constant friend always talking to him. Always keeping him company... Always there for him, showing him the images that his new hormones craved. Sometimes he even slept with it on... A constant companion.

But eventually it wasn't enough too. The aching loneliness wormed it's way into his heart once more, depressing him even more then this stupid war. Eventually he found that he didn't particularly care if they won or lost the missions. Although providing a great deal of help to the humans, they didn't do anything to help him get what he really wanted... To not feel this crushing loneliness any longer.

At times like this it was only Tobias who kept him going. His hawk friend knew what he was going though because he was alone himself. In some ways it was probably worse for Tobias... There was no one in the whole universe like he. No other person trapped as a hawk. 

But Ax found it hard to feel sorry for him... At least Tobias had Rachel while he himself had no one.

Wearily Ax clicked off his TV. He was far to preoccupied with thinking to pay much attention to the shallow images. It didn't offer any comfort anylonger, so why should he bother? It was nearing sunset anyway and he should go and feed...

But Ax made no room to rise, instead he just sat there with all four eyes focused on the blank screen. All the life had gone out of his normally vivid eyes... What was there to live for? Even his precious cinnamon buns had long lost their flavor.

There was a distant sound of heavy footsteps crashing in the forest. Ax flicked his ears towards the sound, but did not look back. He knew it was Tobias anyway. He always came around this time of night, although not usually in human form. Something was up, but Ax found that he didn't care.

Within minutes Tobias had made his way to the small scoop. "Hey Ax! I got something for you to try-" He paused, noting his friend's lack of response. "Ax? You okay, man?"

Yes. I am fine. He lied, his tone curt. Swiveling his stalks backwards he saw that Tobias clutched a plastic food unit: Tupperware Despite his lethargy, his interest was piqued. What is that?

Tobias did not smile, but his voice was still pleasant. "Rachel found like a dozen taco sauce packet's at the mall yesterday in the food court and she thought that you would like them."

Ax did not fail to notice some strange spots appearing on Tobias's cheeks when he mentioned Rachel. It reminded him of a blush, but not quite as nice. Almost as if his friend was angry. Anger spots? What is wrong with Rachel?

He gave sort of a sad sigh, "She and I... We see differently on some things and it kind of came to head today."

Like what?

"Like... She wants me to overstay the two hour limit.... Become human and I-" Again he broke off, shaking his head. "You know what? Nevermind. I shouldn't be unloading my crap on you. Here. Eat." He tossed the package to Ax, who did not catch it. The package fell to the forest floor, splitting open, the plastic packet's spilling out.

Ax concentrated on his human morph and when the changes were complete, he bent down to pick up the packets, obediently ripping one open and tasting it. "It is lovely." He muttered, standing up and tossing it aside, completely ignoring the others.

"Ax?" Tobias wondered, gazing into him. "What's wrong?" 

A strange lump grew inside Ax's throat, blocking his voice. Shaking his head, he tried to look away only to have Tobias's hand grip his chin and turn his head around until he was looking right at him.

"Ax... What's wrong? Come on. You can tell me."

Looking into Tobias's eyes and seeing concern etched across his normally dead-pan face, Ax felt the last of his will breaking. Swallowing past the lump he started, "I just feel so alone... Everyone I ever knew are millions of light years away... and I miss them... I do not want to be here anylonger Tobias..." Tears were leaking down his face now, a new sensation for him.

Tobias did something that Ax considered to be very strange. He pulled Ax into an embrace, his hands rubbing his back. "It's okay... It's okay..."

Ax broke down completely, something very unusual for him. He sagged against Tobias, shaking and sobbing against his body, exercising his pain and misery into something physical. Tobias held him, murmuring soothing things and letting Ax get it all out. Eventually his sobs quieted to nothing and he was finally able to get a hold on himself... But he didn't pull away from Tobias and Tobias continued to hold him.

They stood like that for some minutes, then Tobias did something very strange. He tilted his head to the side and lightly brushed his lips against Ax's neck, a mere dusting of a kiss. A shiver went down Ax's spine, a shiver Tobias must have felt because he did it again and moved his hands from Ax's back to his sides, gripping him in a totally new way which Ax did not find to be unpleasant.

Still he was left wondering... What was Tobias doing? Was this some sort of human form of comfort? It did feel very good... Especially when Tobias started pressing his lips against the front of his neck and then to the hollow, bringing a flood of new sensations to Ax so intense that some sort of a low sound came from his mouth... A moan.

Tobias actually smiled and pulled Ax into a hug once more, feeling Ax's tense muscles relax as he leaned against Tobias's body once more. Ax didn't want this moment to end and neither did Tobias... They didn't this moment of perfect understanding between the two to stop.

Not ever.

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Well there ya go. About halfway though I remembered that the two were related so I stopped it at that point. I will continue if I get to many flames, however. So watch what you say :)

*Skips off to write some more Fred/Jon slash*

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